Moms deal calmly with noisy, demanding children, graciously run last-minute errands for an absent minded husband, efficiently clean the entire house for a surprise visit from the in-laws, and make nutritious meals for everyone. Does she get thanked? Sometimes. Does she get a hug and kiss? Occasionally. Does she get a full half-hour to soak and relax in the bathtub? Never.
We're here to bring peace and relaxation to moms all over, one steamy bathtub at a time. Try one of these tricks to get the whole gang to cooperate!
Rent a riveting adventure movie. Make sure it's one they love. Don't go for something new, or this plan might backfire. Herd husband, kids, and whoever is in the house, in front of the television. Push the play button, hand off the remote, push some popcorn and beverages in front of them, and then tiptoe away. You're free! Fill the tub and enjoy the soak. Bring a book; you might have bought enough time for two or three chapters!
Plan a scavenger hunt. A really long scavenger hunt. Send them outside to find elusive insects, ten rocks of a certain odd color, a four-leaf clover, and a leaf that resembles a president's face. If this isn't challenging enough, make your own scavenger hunt with clues written in a secret code. Tell them they aren't allowed to ask for help for the first half hour. Then lock yourself into the bathroom and find some peace for yourself.
Challenge your family to a cook-off. You vs. them. They get the kitchen for half an hour, designing the most awesome meal they can imagine. If they fail to produce results, you agree to cook something more amazing in the next half hour. As you soak in your aromatic tub, we know you won't even think twice about cooking. You will be so bliss-soaked by then that anything will taste amazingly good!
Encourage your husband to take care of the children. This shouldn't be too hard. Remind him of his best parenting qualities: patience, goofiness, responsibility. Then, make an offhand remark about a park the kids enjoy. You could even say that you would love to take them there yourself, but you're behind on your laundry. As you do this, silently hand your husband his favorite snack. Accept his grateful smile with one of your own, and then escape to the tub as your husband and kids leave for the park. We all know you can fold the laundry at lightning speed, leaving plenty of time for relaxation.
Be honest. This is a trick even the toughest families respect. Simply inform everyone you are a mom, not a superhero, and you would like some well-earned time to enjoy a peaceful bath. There may be some initial resistance, but your family loves you, and they will soon learn how much nicer it is to have a relaxed mom and wife. In fact, they may insist you make a habit of your time away in the bathtub. Accept this honor humbly while you dance and sing on the inside.
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